Less Gas; More A$$ and EAT MORE VITAMINS!

yeah. this is what green, body conscious boulderites do as a form of peaceful message conveyance. oh, and i rode with tyler hamilton thursday (yesterday). he's not as skinny as his TdF days and he still goes like hell...

here's jonathon baker (third in the paceline) representing my purple and orange aka vitamin cottage (picture courtesy of PEZ CYCLING NEWS) at Tour de Nez!

here's dirk friel bustin' a move (PEZ CYCLING NEWS)

here's the fruits of mr. baker's efforts: 2nd in the 3rd stage (a crit, PEZ CYCLING NEWS).

EAT MORE VITAMINS Y'ALL!

I'm A Wee Bit Bummed (w/new pics-tanks Kenny!)

here i am, temporarily lactic acid-free. (kenny's gallery)

the awards ceremony under the auspices of winterpark ski resort
well. did the inaugural winterpark hillclimb today with my colleague and friend billy, kev (which makes up the homey trinity if you count yours truly), billy's son hogan, kenny the mad single-speeder, and billy's friend jon.
here they are, guess who's who (kenny not pictured)

it was jon (red/black long sleeve jersey) and kevin's (crew cut, blue jersey) first time to do a mountain bike race and they rocked it! doing it under an hour is great for a first timer. me, on the other hand, SUCKED! i was three minutes slower this year than last and i came into this thing much more fit than last year. hmmmm. what can i take away from this? one: i should'na cycled the day before with a lot of intensity-climbing intensity nonetheless. two: what billy said ride the course. i think i was over-confident with my mental topography of the course. when the countdown to go went, my legs were so pre-loaded from friday's jaunt that i immediately went into my lactate threshold. had a great start but faded rather quickly. lungs felt great but the legs were hot and heavy. midway through though i passed a butt-load of people but it wasn't enough for a top ten. cadence was synced perfectly with the rhythm of my breathing 'round midway point. don't know what i would've done better except that the lactic acid came early and stayed. i tried to actively rest on the flats but that just made me want to drop it two gears and chase more rabbits. here's the profile of the course. it rose 2,142 feet in 5.3 (agonizing) miles. start elevation: 9075 feet (2766 meters); end elevation: 11,217 (3419m). yikes!
here's the beginning of the climb. the snow's kind of surreal, no (kenny's gallery)?

for the sake of comparison here's billy's time last year: he was 6th out of 14 with a respectable time of 55'39. this year it's 58'08; 8th out of 19. if you do ratio and proportions, it's no change because of the quality of people entering and billy's fitness being on par with his group (even though both of us definitely felt we were more fit this year than last).
the hoge's time last year 1hour 29'. last place (he was eleven last year). this year he wins! top banana! top one percentile. shaves 25' off his time!
check out proud pappa and the hoge with medal around neck

here's yours truly (aka lame-o). last year 6th out of 29. 45'03. i'm saying to myself, it's reasonable to shave-off time this year. nope! here's today's results: 26th out of 63 (more people this year), 3'13 slower than last (coincidentally it's about the same gap as billy's). proportionally i would've gotten 13th with the same fitness. i dropped fitness and the 34 people that entered this year had skill. if i rode my same time last year, i woulda got 15th. mmmmm, sounds like somebody's rationalizing...in fact, my groups' winning time would've gotten them a top 12 finish in the experts. ladies and gentlemen, that's what the cycling world calls a sandbagger. ite now. in addition to hogan winning, here's two more bright spots today. kevin's time: 59'35, which was a smidge (8.2s) quicker than jon's time. this earned them a 16th and 17th place(s) respectively.
kenny the mad single speeder's time was 48'24!
this is a rare moment-him standing still...(kenny's gallery)

what he's saying to the guy on his right is don't let this smile on my face fool you, once i start pedaling i will rip-off your legs to beat your mellon into an unrecognizable slab of sinewy goo, girly-man.
he was only seconds slower than me and he did it on a hardtail! the boy might be possessed. i'm going to throw some holy water on him and check to see if it sizzles at the places where it touched his skin. he finished 14th out of 18. incidentally, kenny senior was in town visiting from california and it was nice to see his pops again. if y'all don't know singlespeed mentality, they're a different breed folks and kenny's on a singlespeed mission this season. if we compare this to our latest cycling bud alec: he busted 1h1' last year. alec's a talented cyclist but is currently taking a brief sabbatical from cycling to pursue a career in full-contact origami and singing the national anthem at illegal dog fights (naw, he's in california). even though i am disappointed in myself, i still had a sunburnt smile on my noggin' at the end of the day (billy too more than likely...) for dinner, we're having haystack goat cheese from longmont...

on a crispity-crunchity ciabatta loaf...

rinsed down with a shirah/petite shiraz/cab blend (red truck-excellent table wine).

the weather today's as magical as yesterday's. we're going to sit on our deck and view some more of this.

truly kids, this is what quality living's all about (my version at least). family, food, friends, and shitting on your neighbor during a bike race all in a scenic, mountain setting? dat's right kids. pictured below are the artifacts of good living: food, wine (for two-my lovely wife and me), kids (the cup o'milk), a good book (east of eden, by steinbeck-billy's recommendation), cycling (the camelback), and a picnic table (outdoors).

i can't complain about my lameness too much i guess. at least i have this oh so groovy watch tan to show-off while i'm holding some vino..

Heaven on earth

winter

right now

today was the reason why we moved up here. the temperature was like goldilocks: not too hot, nor too cold, just right. the top number's inside; the bottom's out.

this is the eve of the inaugural winterpark series and here i am imbibing and eating pizza.
i do believe i'm typing under the influence. here's the guilty party: it's a nice milk stout created by left hand brewery (from here in colorado), and it's creamy while not heavy, with a just a hint of an oaky finish-YUM!!!!

not necessarily the greatest pre-race meal but who cares? i race (if you can call it that), but that doesn't limit me to what i eat. i have no aspirations to become a cat two or an expert mountain biker because i have a family that's pretty righteous coupled with other worthwhile distractions, so, if that's the trade-off i'll take it. it's a celebratory day today. my kids just finished soccer camp punctuated by them playing two hard games on astroturf. astroturf is like a heat sink so they were hammered by the heat and their efforts. we bought pizza for dinner. they fell asleep on the way to the pizza joint so we drove around in our 'hood admiring the weather and i showed melissa the path i cycled today to loosen up my pistons before the hillclimb tomorrow. summertime at 8000' in colorado is indescribably gorgeous. there wasn't a cloud in the sky and my cycling earlier had little car encounters. it was one of those days when the planets were aligned, had a tailwind both directions, sun was shining, and everybody was civil. we scoped out this area three years ago when we were hankering to live up here and it was as gorgeous as we remembered it last. long live colorado summers!
this is our window view!

hopefully i'll have some good news to report about my race tomorrow.
here's some tragic news: tim russert of nbc's meet the press died today. collapsed at work apparently. rest in peace mr. russert.

Today Was A Good Day And I Didn't Have To Use My...

...okay sorry ice cube. here's ice cube's explicit lyrics for the inspiration to my blog's title. it's from his 1992, gangsta rap album the predator. it's a great cd. his given name's actually O'Shea Jackson. let's begin: melissa's-my extraordinary companion-working late tonight so no riding for me this evening (that doesn't involve rollers). after we dropped off my girls at soccer camp, mason and i hiked around evergreen lake. i did this to run some energy out of the dude. it was cold today, some minor cold front's hovering locally so it was almost fall-like. evergreen lake's at 7077' or 2157 meters, hence the fall-like comparison (with this unusual cold front). there was hardly anybody out there, except for a family we saw again (where we exchanged pleasantries) when we eventually moseyed into the library. they're doing street improvements at the intersection from highway 74 to the evergreen lake house/rec center so that means a boat load of trucks were out there which translates to spellbinding fascination of these huge trucks with mason. he was just dumbfounded and awe-struck watching these trucks and large machines moving to and fro and receiving and/or dumping rocks from bulldozers and other sundry big-arsed machines. i think he was hyp-moh-tahzed (hypnotized) audio-visually by the six-wheeled, one person, bulldozer (i think it's called a bobcat?). this cold made us go into a local coffee/pastry joint in downtown, historical evergreen strip where we ordered a hot chocolate, topped with whipped cream (for him) and a double-espresso (for me). their espresso was aaaahhiiite (so-so). i always compare my espressos to my bud kenny's espressos. kenny has a saeco machine that creates (he makes 'em actually) these buttery-yet slightly edgy, cream colored, velvety-finish espressos that are simply sublime when we meet as his joint before we go riding or to do some general tom foolery...i digress...it was actually enjoyable hanging out with the moose-unlike yesterday's tribulation(s) with him. i said to myself now i see why people shake their babies. i mean i can see where people's tempers get the best of them; hopefully, my self-control, self-editing systems will always be in place when my blood pressure starts to rise exponentially. yup, that was yesterday. today's--wednesday--a different creature altogether. nothing but a good moose and happier dad.
i scored at the library too. i checked out common's be; art blakey & the jazz messengers' free for all (quite possibly the best jazz assemblage since miles' kind of blue ensemble); my morning jacket's tennessee fire; and lupe fiasco's food & liquor. man! i always sing praises to the jefferson county public library's evergreen branch. i also checked out a book titled: God's Problem: How the Bible Fails to Answer Our Most Important Question-Why We Suffer from Bart D. Ehrman. heard a trailer for it on npr via neil cohen interviewing said author. you gotta love national public radio.this was wednesday.
i'm adding thursday to this blog starting now...and in order for me to go riding with the moose (attached to the kid trailer), i had to patch a flat on the chariot and clean up and maintain my giant road bike since the last time i road her (since i purchased the fuji). i slapped a pair of my old time a-tac pedals on her too because i cannibalized my speedplay zeroes on the fu-g.
here's the (nws) weather report:
Late Afternoon: A 10 percent chance of showers and thunderstorms. Mostly cloudy, with a high near 66. Breezy, with a west wind around 22 mph.
that westerly wind was brutal! i tried to head south so that i wouldn't get the full effect of a headwind. there were some parts of the bike path that i felt the full brunt of a headwind, i was in my 39x24 just barely crawling. if there was an uphill if i stopped pedaling, i'da fallen over. on the flip side, during the tailwind portions i was cruuuuising-probably going close to 40 miles an hour. there were also parts of the trail where i was riding diagonally due to the winds. yeah boi! i got a real nice workout. it seemed like one big interval workout today. i rode in such a way that my suffering would be comparable-albeit slight-to race conditions. another interesting note: i purchased some new earbuds for my ipod called skullcandy. yeah i know it sounds kinda ill but the bass response is quite satisfying; and the silicon frames around the speakers really eliminate the wind noise resulting from my pistons propelling me forward at rather manly speeds. i picked up the girls from their soccer (camp) practice and now it's time for some homemade fries and some vegetarian chicken patties on the grill for din-din.
newsworthy mention: the supreme court today reversed dub-ya's congress approved special laws for enemy combatants detained at guantanamo. instead o'doing a tribunal-like court for enemy combatants/terrorists..etc. each detainee is now obligated to a criminal trial a la federal court(s) to see if their detention is legit (habeas corpus). kinda nutty, if we don't kill you because you're trying to kill us (or running planes into iconic buildings)-but instead get captured-we'll give you a fair trial. can't we just slap some geneva convention on 'em and treat em as war criminals? i can respect the justices though putting a checks-and-balances on the president and his spiraling out-of-control executive orders...hmmmm i smell bureaucratic implosion for our federal courts on our tab kids.....

Looks Like Rain Today

here's what a typical day's like for daddy daycare. today, mason woke me up about 7 o'clock with a smile and pushing on my tummy. so, i tell him to go potty and to put on his big boy underwear (i keep telling myself one day, i too will wear big boy underpants but until then i'll keep dreaming until that day arrives). he helps me make waffles. my god, i didn't know how much i loved waffles until this summer. i like 'em crispy on the outside and soft on the inside. kind of like yours truly in the summertime. the girls get up around 8:30 and we eat breakfast. my sweet melissa left me some plates from dinner last night so i clean up that mess and generally pick up after ourselves. the reason i wasn't home for dinner last night is because i joined my friend and college (university of texas, boy!!!)buddy charles in boulder for the oh so notorious bus stop ride. it's where the hardcore, elite road cyclists (including some pros) show up for a group ride (i call it the shit-on-your-neighbor ride). we go and i make it almost to the end. it's great intensity and i can always use high-intensity pack riding. i get shelled about 5 miles back towards town on our return trip (yes i cycle, but i didn't say i was good). we get back and i eat fish tacos with charles at illegal pete's.
10:30 rolls around and we're out playing. a front's coming in and it looks like rain's a'comin'.

i check the nws website and here's what they're saying about today/tonight.

This Afternoon: A 40 percent chance of showers and thunderstorms. Mostly cloudy, with a high near 69. North northeast wind around 5 mph.

Tonight: A chance of showers and thunderstorms, then showers likely and possibly a thunderstorm after midnight. Cloudy, with a low around 35. North wind around 5 mph becoming calm. Chance of precipitation is 60%.



before

we've been spoilt lately by having our house in the high 60s at night so i chainsaw some firewood for a couple of nights burning...








after

...while the kids train for paris-nice, liege-baston-liege, paris-roubaix, and some other classics and semi-classics. maybe, one day, they'll get the invite for a national tour.





here they are tearing it up on our private dirt road

for lunch i'm grilling black bean burgers and baking tater-tots. both these gastronomical treats'll be drowning in ketchup if my kids had their food accessorising proclivities. here's proof:

the kids are playing indoors now while listening to the soundtrack from the movie enchanted. if y'all don't have kids, the disney factor might be minimal in your quotidian goings on; but, watching the dvd with my family i must say i truly enjoyed this cutesy, very disney movie. during quiet time, mason has to nap while maricel has to read to me for 30 minutes. she's reading snow white to me. she's quite the reader nowadays. maura does her artwork and also reads. boring enough yet? well anyhoo it's the late afternoon now. i'ma make some vegetable stir-fry with fried rice (it's not really fried) while the chilluns enjoy some good ole pbs kids' shows. personally i looove word girl (and her sidekick, captain huggy face)!
if you're not hip to word girl, it's kind of like pee-wee's playhouse where there's a word-of-the-day. this video clip's of capt. huggy face bustin' a move on the word-of-the-day: pensive (do you know what pensive means? think about it...then play the vid. i crack myself up sometimes...).

ite den kids. i'll talk to you later (sorry the tubes-i'm dating myself here...)

Yee-haw you Sahklin' Mow-ROHNS!!!!

read this essay about barney fife and his way of enforcing life in mayberry...

http://www.co.larimer.co.us/Sheriff/bulls_Eye/BullEye.htm
Cyclists and Dodge City
By Sheriff Jim Alderden-Larimer County

Don’t you just love this time of year, when the birds, boats and cyclists come out? Well, two out of three ain’t bad.

Tis the time of year for countless walking, running and cycling events that positively or negatively affect each of us. Then there’s the inevitable conflict between the motorists and cyclists using roads that are in disrepair and aren’t fit for either. The Sheriff’s Office and other law enforcement agencies are tasked with keeping the peace and enforcing the laws. The end result is that nobody is happy with us.

First, let me address the numerous events that impact traffic flow and raise the ire of the affected neighborhoods. All of these events require a permit. There are several stages of review. Many of these cross jurisdictional lines and require approval from the municipalities that they traverse, the county and the state. In the case of the county permits, they are NOT issued by the Sheriff’s Office but from the Commissioners. In addition to the Sheriff’s Office reviewing the plans for the events, the Health Department, Road and Bridge, Parks Department, Engineering and the appropriate ambulance, hospital and fire departments all review the plans and either approve or impose conditions. In the case of the Sheriff’s Office, we REQUIRE notification of affected residents, a traffic plan, certified traffic control personnel at key intersections, and volunteers at other locations. If the event is a race, we require either full or rolling road closures. Again, we are charged with making the event as safe as possible, but can’t deny a permit just because it inconveniences people. That’s a balancing act for the County Commissioners.

The Sheriff’s Office no longer assigns personnel to these events except in the most extreme circumstances due to staffing shortages, other high priority events that dictate deputies be assigned to work overtime, and the liability associated with these events. When we do, the event must pay the costs associated with the services provided. I don’t remember the last time we assisted with one of these due to the volume of other off-duty work where the services of a sworn deputy are needed. (As an aside, to the person who groused on the Reporter Herald RH line about the Sheriff’s Office escorting a group of cyclists on Glade Road on Saturday, May 10, the Sheriff’s Office was NOT involved in this event and we definitely did NOT have a car escorting the cyclists either on duty or on overtime. This event was a collegiate event hosted by Colorado State University, so I suspect that the lead car may have been a CSUPD car.)

Second, let me address the issue of cyclists in general and our enforcement practice. I’ve recently received a deluge of e-mails from the cycling community of Boulder after a group of them encountered a deputy who gave then the “don’t let the sun set on your behind in my county” speech or something akin to that. What the rider claimed was that the deputy offered the option of either returning to Boulder County or receiving a ticket for the alleged violation (more on that in a moment). That may be what they heard, but the deputy is adamant that isn’t exactly what was said. Apparently there was some dialogue (argument) about the interpretation of the applicable statute and the cyclists were advised that we were going to enforce the law regarding impeding the traffic flow in our county. The deputy continued by stating that perhaps they should return to Boulder County where they indicated they could ride two abreast, or be cited if they continued to do so here. It really wasn’t a “get out of Dodge” ultimatum but “if you stay in Dodge, be prepared to follow the rules or suffer the consequences.” Perhaps he could have been more tactful, but anytime you get to even suggest something to deal with Dodge City, its okay in my book.

Actually, we have a bonus point system when ticketing individuals from Boulder. So far, the deputy in question has won a toaster oven and is close to earning a rod and reel combination. (Just kidding!)

Now to the real issue and the reason for the contact in the first place. We have been receiving complaints about cyclists hogging the road in the southern part of the county so we have stepped up our presence. Not surprisingly, many of these cyclists cop an attitude when stopped. Also not surprising, many of the cyclists with attitudes are part of the Boulder cycling community. Now, I’ve had some fun making fun of Boulder in the past (all warranted by the way) and some will say this is just another attempt to bash Boulder, but this is what has been reported to me. Many have taken to not carrying identification, so when asked to identify themselves for purposes of determining if there are any outstanding warrants (which we always check), it isn’t unreasonable to determine their county of residence. (Another warning – When issuing a citation for a violation, if we can’t verify the identification of the cyclist, they WILL be taken to jail pending identification and their bicycles impounded. This isn’t a threat. Its the way we operate.)

The dispute is over interpretation of C.R.S. 42-4-1412(5): “Any person riding a bicycle shall ride in the right hand lane. When being overtaken by another vehicle, such person shall ride as close to the right-hand side as practicable. Where a paved shoulder suitable for bicycle riding is present, persons operating bicycles shall ride on the paved shoulder….” Also at issue section (6)(a) “Persons operating bicycles on roadways shall ride single file: except that riding no more than two abreast is permitted in the following circumstances: (I) When riding two abreast will not impede the normal and reasonable movement of traffic…” Many feel that they can ride two abreast as long as vehicle approaching from the rear can get around them, even if the motorist has to go into the oncoming lane of traffic. Our reading of the statute doesn’t require that traffic actually be impeded, only that it the cyclists riding two abreast would impede the normal flow of traffic if vehicles had to swerve into the oncoming lane, especially when there is a double yellow line as is the case in many of the winding roads favored by the cyclists. Further, section 6 doesn’t negate the requirement of section 5 to ride on the paved shoulder or as far to the right as feasible when being overtaken. While riding two abreast, one of the pair isn’t as far to the right as possible. When being overtaken, in order to get as far to the right as possible, they must ride single file if there is only one lane in that direction. If there is a paved shoulder, they should be riding on the shoulder, not in the traffic lane, regardless of whether or not they are impeding traffic.

The arguments offered by the cyclists are similar to those made by many motorists when blowing stop signs. “There were no other cars coming, so why should I have to stop?” - “They could still get around us, so what difference does it make?”

I believe in minimal enforcement to achieve the desired result. Our deputies have been giving verbal warnings, as was done to the Boulder cyclists. The warnings haven’t been heeded. I don’t expect my deputies to have to debate the point any further. We will begin issuing tickets for these violations, whether the offender lives in Larimer County, Boulder, or Dodge City.

To the motoring public, this does not mean its open season on cyclists. We also have received some complaints about motorists throwing objects at cyclists or harassing them. We will be equally aggressive in defending the rights of the cyclists to share the road as long as done legally and responsibly.

May 20, 2008
ps. thanks jayson

It Was Mason's Birthday Yesterday

he turned the big three point oh (that's two significant digits). we celebrated by going out for a hike near where we live with our in-laws, their dog, and our family including dogs. it was good. mason's turning into a pretty good hiker whereas maura's starting to get lazy. one of his presents was an inflatable t-ball set. he loved it. in fact, before we dug into his ice-cream cake, we had a quick game of t-ball in our front yard. here he is with his colorado rockies pennant hat (they're awful this year) right after he smacked the ball off the tee, grinning ear to ear.

and here's another view-aerial-of his ice-cream cake.

today, sunday, i went for a slammin' ride with my boy and teammate christopher. from denver we went up deer trail (see previous video) over to high grade, down co. 73, turned on co. 74 to bergen park but told chris i gotta turn around in order to make it back on time. so we pulled a u-bone off of 74 and continued to descent 73 into morrison and back home. all told, not counting breaks, it probably took us 5.5 h. on the very last climb out of high grade chris and i turned it into a crap on your neighbor ride (i.e. sprinting towards our imaginary finish line). he was climbing pretty good today and on this real long grinder he just mashed it, we were both fading but since i'm pretty intimate with the geography of this route i knew i could kick it towards the tail end of this climb. we were both cratered after each of our humongous, big chain ring attacks (if that's what you want to call it) and unable to shake each other off our respective wheels. and with that, it ended-quite satisfyingly-our uphill portion of our route. we descended like sleds and i was able to make it home within my hour wiggle factor. i'm guessing it was less than or equal to a 70 mile ride. next weekend's a very uphilly race starting in boulder called the mike horgan hillclimb. we climb on a street called magnolia, and on some dirt roads. look at the profile, the first surge is magnolia. the second surge is sugarloaf where the race ends. ouch kids.

it's kinda crazy but i know i won't come in last (but i'll probably be close). in colorado all the freaks show up for hillclimb races. afterwards, it was suggested that our whole vitamin cottage crew go for a long team ride. sounds painful. the jury's still out for this one kids...
today's funny highlight: when we were in lakewood--extremely hypoglycemic--at a red light, a dude taking a corner really squirrely-like had tri bars on his bike. as roadies we have this thing against triathletes on their geeked-out bikes. so, chris goes into this hans and frans voice impersonation (snl that is)or like arnold schwarzenegger as the tri-geek (in first person), and i chime in with something i'd rather not repeat and we were dying at the light. we couldn't inhale and we were both slapping our handlebars and repeating what i said, looking for the light to change to green. omygod we were dying of laughter from a hypoglycemic induced state-of-mind. i could only guess what motorists were thinking when they saw us off our rockers, pole position at a major intersection.